Shukran, Morocco: What I learned from the Women I Met on My Solo Trip to Morocco

For reference: As of the publish date of this article, 1 British Pound = 12 Moroccan Dirhams (DH) and 1 US Dollar = 9 Moroccan Dirhams (DH).

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Part 1: Prior to Traveling to Morocco…

What was your biggest apprehension about traveling alone?

Before my trip, I read a lot of articles about the solo travel experience in Morocco and was a little unsure of how would I be treated as a Western foreigner… as a non-Muslim person… as a cisgender woman of color,  traveling alone in Morocco!

While I could not find many online articles about solo female travelers of color, I collect a few helpful tips on “how to responsibly travel in Morocco” (i.e. proper clothing, customs, tipping standards, manners, common Arabic phrases, methods of transportation, bartering, etc). One of the most useful tips I read was to pack more “modest” clothing and bring a scarf to cover my shoulders and hair.

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Was there any truth to your concerns as a solo traveler?

The truth is, most of the people I met in Morocco were warm, friendly, and polite. Usually, they were curious about why I was alone or in awe of my ethnic background. Some people would kindly ask me in surprise, “Where are you from?” or “Can I take a selfie with you?!”

On the flip side, I also received a lot of verbal harassment from a significantly largely portion of men of all ages and professions. Teenage boys strolling along the boardwalk… middle-aged men squeezing fresh fruit at their juice stand… leather shop owners… and random people in the street consistently screeched, yelled, and call out to me:

Ni Haooo. Konichiawaaa. Chinaaa? Japaaan? Koreaaa?

Sometimes, while meandering in the Medina alone, I would receive invitations from men to drink tea with them (which is a very common gesture in Morocco). I shared several cups of tea with some really interesting people (all men). However, if it seemed like they wanted something in return or my gut was telling me to walk away, I swiftly declined.

The most blunt interaction was in the center of the bustling square of Jemaa el-Fnaa in Marrakech, where someone asked if I wanted to have sex with him.

Newsflash: That is not a way to make a woman feel beautiful, respected, or desired.

My experience in Morocco appears to indicate some of the similar themes surrounding treatment of women in both Western and non-Western countries. I can personally testify to the fact that I’ve been cat-called in the majority of the places I’ve visited in both the U.S. and abroad.

Looking back upon all of my human interactions in Morocco, I must also point out that 0% of the women I encountered screamed at me. No woman asked me if I wanted to have sex with them. No woman greeted me by saying, “Konichiwa.” (By the way, I speak English). Every single woman that I met, whether they were Moroccan or not, showed complete kindness, respect, and thoughtfulness.

Isn’t that interesting?

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Part 2: During Morocco…

What was the best part of your trip?

The women I met in Morocco. The women I met of Morocco.

Why?

Because they were bold, generous, and relatable.

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1. A woman from Rabat who embodied kindness and friendship

During my first sunset alongside the Atlantic Ocean in Rabat, I met a woman heading to the water just like me. We waded into the spine-shiveringly cold water and stood together in silence… separated by language (She spoke Arabic and French, and I spoke English and Spanish)… but brought together by this peaceful evening along coast of Northern Africa.

At one point, she pointed at a girl splashing in the waves in a bikini, and raised her eyebrows: “American”. I laughed and said, “I don’t think she’s American… She’s speaking fluent German! I think she is German, not American!”

We laughed together.

Even though my maxi dress was getting drenched, I was secretly relieved that I didn’t wear eyebrow-raising clothes to the beach.

After we acclimated to the freezing water, my new friend snapped several crookedly candid moments of my blissful self… alone in Morocco for the very first time. I felt extremely centered and at peace in those moments.

Eventually, we ran out of the water and played football with her friends.

Thank you for being the first person to welcome me to your city and country.

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2.  A tour guide from Meknes who embodied Moroccan pride

For a portion of my trip, I chose to embark on a small tour for travellers in their 20’s. Our tour guide, Mimi, was a woman in her early 20s, who prided herself in being one of the few female tour guides in Morocco. She repeatedly stated that the percentage of female tour guides in Morocco is in the low single digit percentages. I couldn’t find any statistics to confirm whether or not this is true, but according to a 2017 International Monetary Fund report, Morocco’s current labor force participation rate for women is 25% (Source).

Mimi openly shared her love for her country, her favorite musical artists, foods, traditions, holidays, upbringing in Meknes, and… her love of Bollywood (and specifically of actors like Shahrukh Khan)! It was so interesting to see, taste, and listen to the world of modern-day Moroccan culture through the lense of someone my own age.

Mimi, thank you for sharing your Moroccan pride.

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3. A woman from Todra Gorge who embodied independence and loyalty

When we visited the Todra Gorge, we met Aysha, an older woman who lives at the top of these very steep mountains. When her husband passed away several years ago, she decided to spend the rest of life living in the mountains, in part, to honor her husband’s memory.

Her community was initially shocked by her choice. They offered to pay her food and housing if she agreed to live down with the community. She refused and stayed firm with her decision. Today, she lives in the mountains and makes her way down when she needs to stock up on supplies. We met Aysha briefly, and then she swiftly disappeared back into the landscape.

Aysha, thank you for taking the time to say hello.

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4. The female Berber Dancers who embodied fun and energy

During one night in the Middle Atlas, I wore a kaftan and danced with Berber musicians and dancers. The dancer’s outfits were adorned with little mirrors on their wrist and hips that jingled to the ambiguous beat of the music. The musical ensemble consisted of two drummers and one viola player who used a cello bow.

My favorite Berber song included one sound “Ha”, where they would repeat and echo at different volumes and cadences, over and over again.

Ha-hahahaha-haha-ha-ha-ha.

The dancers drew us in, and welcomed our silly moves. We danced in circles and in two lines with one side kneeling towards the other. I’m glad we got to dance with these Berber dancers and musicians, in the middle of the middle Atlas on a windy and cold night.

Berber dancers, thank you for a fun evening of dancing.

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5. A new friend from Dehli, India who embodied empowerment, maturity, and drive

During the tour, I was matched up with a roommate from Dehli, India. We connected instantly, due to our similarities in travel style. Instead of choosing a sit-down dinner, we both preferred to explore and uncover each place in a different way. 

What is the local delicacy? What is the typical go-to dinner in the area? Where do people spend their evenings?

Every evening my friend and I embarked on an adventure into the Medina, and sampled our way through dinner. For 20 DH, we feasted on kafta (beef sausage), which was exquisitely spiced and tender.

For 19 DH, we ate a plate of super sweet pastries for lunch – Moroccans absolutely love their honey and sugar.

For 6 DH, we shared a small pot of Moroccan mint tea, which was an absolute steal!  For 5 DH, we split a sandwich called croscote, which is filled with fried potato, hot sauce, fried egg, spicy potato. The croscote became my go-to snack, lunch, or dinner choice.

One Tuesday evening, we played with kids who spoke French and Arabic.

How old are you? What are your names?

All of the kids knew how to do the following move sequence: fist bump, high five, left smack, right smack, bump up, bump down, bump center, handshake. After we fist-bumped one kid, troves of kids ran over to repeat the same moves with us — I was amazed to see how they all knew how to do every single move perfectly!

If we had eaten at a restaurant that night, we would’ve missed out on the excitement of playing with kids a Tuesday evening.

In addition to sharing her evenings with me, my new friend also shared her own experiences growing up in Dehli. She explained the similarities and differences between Moroccan and her Indian culture. She was both surprised and proud to learn that Bollywood played a significant role in Morocco’s entertainment industry.

One of my favorite quotes from her is the following: “As you get older, you realize the world is a lot more flexible than you think.”

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6. A girl fight in Moulay Idriss, which emphasized universal feelings and sentiments

One evening while walking back to our hostel, my friend and I broke up a fight between two young girls. Both girls appeared to be less than 12 years old, with one girl swinging a giant bamboo stick and the other girl trying to protect her younger sister. The youngest girl’s hijab was ripped off and she had a bloody wound on her nose.

My friend and I were shocked at the intensity of the fight in front of us. No one else was in the street, so we quickly intervened, and separated both parties. I remember trying to pry away the bamboo stick from the girl, and was caught off guard by the seemingly resolute sense of hate in her eyes and unwavering conviction in her grip. She was not playing around.

Once the girls were separated, we sternly asked in French, “Where are you parents? Where is home? Why are you fighting?” When they refused to answer, we told them to go home. They eventually obeyed us, even though the fight was clearly not finished. When I looked behind my shoulder to make sure the fight was over, I saw the girl and her younger sister silently wave at us as if to say “Thank You”.

This incident was both troubling and scary, but I am glad that my friend and I felt safe and empowered enough to break up this fight.

The veracity of the fight emphasized the universal feelings of anger and vengeance and the fact that they can exist anywhere in our world. It reminded me that violence can arise at a very young age as well.  

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Part 3: After Travelling to Morocco…

What did you learn from your trip?

1. I learned that cats are in abundance for a multitude of reasons in Morocco…

2. I learned that yellow is actually a great color.

I never liked the color yellow until visiting Morocco. I fell in love with the yellow accent color found in many tile patterns, and even spent 5 hours shopping for yellow leather slippers one day. I ended up buying orange-colored leather slippers instead.

3. I learned that the sexist treatment of women by men exists everywhere.

4. I learned that good mint tea requires a fresh mint leaf plant.

So when I got home, I immediately bought a mint plant and have been making my own fresh mint tea every since.

5. I’ve decided that once you’ve been to one religious house of worship, you’ve kind of been to them all.

Additionally, I think if you’ve been to one Mosque, you’ve been to them all. The Hassan II Mosque was great, but I think that you could easily skip the indoor toor, save 120 dirhams, and just take pictures outside. The lighting was better outside anyway.

Note: I kind of feel the same way about trips to sandy deserts as well… they’re all sandy! (Yes, I recognize that I am very lucky to have been to so many great deserts already, like the Namib, Sahara, and Gobi Desert)

6. I learned that some of my most memorable meals were simple meals in the Medina.

I ate spicy snails for 5DH that were absolutely heavenly.

And for two weeks, I drank 4-5 small cups of tea each day. The memory below is simple, sugary, and sweet: The weather is temperate. A light breeze. The sun is warm. I really can’t complain, sipping my 10 DH tea on top of the Spice Market in Marrakech. It’s perfect. 

7. I learned that I connected deeply with Moroccan artists’ version of “modern art”.

It spoke to me. It made much more sense than stuffy American modern art.

8. I learned that some of the best “must-see sites” were not museums, palaces, or tourist sites, but rather public places.

I visited a Jewish cemetery in Marrakech and exchanged a quiet acknowledgement with a really old man.

I also spent an afternoon taking photos and exploring a 5-Star hotel in Marrakech… for free!

9. I learned that a “Moroccan taco” is an “American burrito”.

Also, restaurants labeled as “fast-food” establishments took 20 minutes to complete a takeout order.

10. I learned that I’m really interested in what women have to say.

11. Lastly, this trip fueled the conviction to continue to design a life that I enjoy living.

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Have you ever traveled alone?  What was your experience like?

Have you ever traveled to Morocco?

Which places would you recommend?